Welcome back.....SLEEP!!!!

For those who said it wouldn't happen on its own. For those who said(people who wrote the books) that I couldn't "let it happen" ....IT DID. WE ARE SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!
Really, it just happened. We do a little crying, but nothing serious, then we're out. From 7:30pm until between 6:30 and 8. It's like a dream come true. I'm not sure what to do in such an alert state. But I am loving it and it is proof that sometimes, they just have to come into these things on their own. Not all babies can be "trained" to sleep. But sleep does come...........I already feel the bags under my eyes fading. Good riddance!

The fussy baby travels.......

Well, we went to Asheville for doula training. The high need howler was an angel in the car. He did very good all weekend and had lots of adventures with dad. He didn't sleep half bad considering we were in a tiny hotel room with a porta crib that he doesn't sleep in very often. It was a great time of bonding for all of us and daddy turned 40 while we were there. We love Asheville and want to retire there. Right now though, charlotte needs doulas!

I'm encouraged that the colicky demeanor really seems to have disappeared. He isn't unusually cranky or sensitive. It's almost like he just grew out of it. He's a mover, for sure though. Not satisfied to sit around in one place too long....much like daddy.

I truly believe as life moves forward in positive directions, so do the high needers. Bless their hearts.....and the hearts of their sleep deprived parents.

Ahhh....adventures continue.....

So it seems that my little baby continues to grow and grow and seemingly becomes happier. Could it be that these colicky babies are just restless? Are they born knowing they are destined to grab and walk and eat Cheerios and they are just living a tortured existence until they can do it? LOL Who knows? I do know that after being home with him all week(my mom was at the beach....no babysitter...no work!) he seems much happier and calm. We did have one difficult night. I felt like I should try to help him go back to sleep on his own so I didn't pick him up, but I stayed with him and rubbed his little head and back. It took him 2 hours to get back to sleep. He didn't cry the whole time, but it was still exhausting. Last night, he woke up and I fed him(it was almost 3:30 and I have to leave for work at 4:30 am) and he went right back to sleep. I would like to think I helped him to do that!



I think the climate of the home is really key to their fussies too. With a graduation and many other changes coming, our home has been somewhat chaotic and sometimes downright tense. Some kids are just radars that respond to the least little tremor.



So we have made a real effort to maintain a peaceful spirit in our home. Of course, when you have a teenager counting down the days until she can move out, this can be difficult. But it really makes J and I become more conscious of the way we interact in our marriage. It's not just about us. Our issues affect everyone, even the baby. There is nothing wrong with having to examine your relationship a little closer and force yourselves to find ways to work through petty.....and not so petty differences. We have to work things out and not hold grudges or walk around with a chip on our shoulder. That isn't easy, but wow is it worth it.



So perhaps the world needs fussy babies in order to unite us???????? I would love to know how many people who have been recognized for their peacemaking and humanitarian efforts might have been colicky babies.



Saving the world.....one howler at a time........ :)

Bring on the milestones....and the fussies

So it seems that "un-fussy" babies can become fussy when they begin to reach milestones as it is a time of much processing for them. Well, Jude is moving right along...fussies and all. It seems that in two weeks he has started sitting up from a lying position(and if he does this in his crib at night, he can't figure out how to lie back down...argh!), crawling and saying "UH-OH." When he isn't doing that, he needs to be held and allowed to fuss a bit here and there. Our arms are getting their workouts once again. But it is so exciting to see him seeing the world in a new way and I know that we are coming closer to that one year mark where they seem to grow even faster right before your eyes.

He is sleeping better at night. We left the ped last time with the Prevacid and we are still waiting to see if it helps with the tummy troubles. We are getting up about twice a night....once to help him lie back down and once at around 4am to eat. Because I need to help keep up my milk supply while working, I haven't tried to get rid of the night feedings. I will start that in July.

I have begun my doula training process and I think that Jude has actually become a little more calm and happy. I think that I have been happier and feeling more fulfilled as I finally feel like I am pursuing a calling on my life and doing something that I really desire to do. It seems that he can almost "sense" that and it calms him also. This is important in my being more conscious in how I deal with stress. I wonder if colicky/fussy babies have a stronger "radar" for mom and/or dad's stress levels and anxiety. Working so much at the gym has been a HUGE stress for me and for the family as a whole. Perhaps we'll all get some relief as I follow my call......

Wear your fussy with pride....

so check out this website for the official fussy baby onesie
http://www.fussybaby.ca/fussybabyonesies.html

We are having a very trying week. We are experiencing frequent night waking again. We are literally walking zombies. Last night I tried to do the cry it out, but his cry gets stronger and louder as the minutes go by. An hour later, I gave up and put him in bed with me and he finally settled.

And it's 9pm and he's crying now........ugh........why is this happening?

We see the ped for the 9 mo check up tomorrow and we are going to make a real plan...I'm determined.

Hey....where am I?

Do you ever have those weeks where you are so busy that you can't get anything done but then you wonder what you were so busy doing if nothing is done????

So my friend, Heather who also is a fellow fussy baby mama, says that her pediatrician told her that colic is over at 6 months and that now her baby is just cranky(at 9 mos). Helloooooooo dr know it all, that is precisely my point. The colic part is over....the late night constant screaming and so on. But it seems that these babies continue on to have an overall disposition that just seems to be somewhat unhappy. Some days it makes me so sad. I really need some doctors to get on the boat and validate this stuff. Do they have any idea what it makes a mom feel like when you tell her, "she's just a cranky baby" WHY IS MY BABY CRANKY??????

Dr. Sears feels like it is part of an overall temperament in these kids. Ok, I can buy that, but it seems that there has to be more.

So now I am starting a new book....The Crying Baby by Sheila Kitzinger. She is very big on the midwife/homebirth/natural birth scene and I am interested in what she has to say. I will keep you posted.

I guess I just want to know what I can do to make sure this fussy child, whether it is some type of physical pain or just his personality, is as secure, happy and successful as possible. I want to be sure I am doing the right things for him. I want to know if there is anything I can do to make his world easier to deal with.......and mine too.

What do you do about a fussy mama????

There is something about the hormone shift after a baby that can make a momma fussy even on happy baby days. This has been my week. I find myself suddenly wondering where in the world 9 months have gone! Let me say that those first 4-5 fussy months seemed so long at the time, but they are a distant memory now and I find myself wanting my baby back. I just look at him and see how he has gone from such a tiny, helpless wailer to a baby on the move...seeing, exploring and learning. Time goes by so quickly.

My fussy baby has been a gift. His presence has forced me to learn to slow down and take care of myself. You may not accomplish much in your house during those hours of walking, rocking, bouncing and swaying.....but every touch and nuzzle is a love deposit in their little heart and I am convinced that this has a soothing and healing affect on their soul. Your healing will come in time also, so don't give up. There will come a day when he/she begins to smile at you, laugh at you and reach for you and you will know that your baby is happy and healthy and totally in love with you.

During nights of wailing, I found that it soothed me and kept me calm if I sang songs. Some of my favorites were praise songs:

Shout to the Lord(no pun intended)
Jesus, Lover of My Soul
I Could Sing of Your Love Forever
In the Blessing

I also enjoyed singing Jack Johnson, David Grey and that Pooh Corner song by Kenny Loggins. On the nights when the crying wouldn't stop, these songs helped lighten my mood enough that I could handle an hour of holding and crying without breaking down myself.

Music soothes the soul.....try it....it may just save your sanity in that final half hour of howling.